What is going on in this house? It's the million dollar question that I'd really, really like answered. Brennan came down with croup last Thursday night. I took him to the doctor Friday afternoon to get him some steroids. Dr. Y is nice and understanding enough to know that Carter will follow closely behind and gave us more meds than B needed so that C would be covered too. Carter got his first dose Sunday night when his croupy cough began. They've both had fevers since Saturday and neither Motrin nor Tylenol can get them to break.
Last night we started Operation: Evan's Room. He's been sleeping in our bed for almost a year now. Don't ask how that happened, it boils down to being crappy parents, Evan's anxiety, and his abilities to play us like a fiddle. We went to see Dr. Y about this Monday.
I guess the majority of this turn around is in my hands since I"m the stricter parent between the two of us. Last night was the first night and I was digging myself a foxhole and preparing for the worst. Which turned out to be not bad at all. Ev whimpered a little and began to cry when it was time to drop the bomb, but I was firm and I think he understood for once that Mom meant business. Plus, it helped that I turned his doorknob around yesterday to where it locks from the outside - and he sat there and watched me do it and seemed to get the severity of what was happening.
He went down without a fight. Are you shocked, because I was. Talk about that kid throwing me for an awesome "holy cow, this can't be real" loop! All night I was expected something to go completely awry, and it never did. He made his way into the doorway of our room three times though. Never made a sound, Kevin or I would wake up and notice him standing there. Kind of creepy. But, I would get up and walk him back to his room where he'd lay his head back on the pillow without a protest.
Hopefully tonight goes just as well as last night. But, I'm going to err on the side of caution and Murphy's Law and not count my chickens before they hatch (enough cliches for you?)
Maybe things are starting to turn around for us? I'm really not sure why the twins keep getting sick, and everyone else around here for that matter. But I hope we've paid our dues and are back on the track to healthy living soon.
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Saturday, January 15, 2011
A Non-Update Update
What's new you ask? Nothing and everything. More sick kids, but I think that's just a given now. A couple of weeks ago that nasty stomach bug that's been sweeping the country hit our house. We all succumbed to it one by one like a game of dominoes personified. Then things got better. I went back to work, the boys returned to daycare, I had surgery to get my adenoids removed, I WENT BACK TO THE GYM(!), the house got cleaned, the Mt. Everest sized pile of laundry was tackled, did I mention that I went back to the gym?
I was so excited to make my grand re-entrance into my little world of health and fitness after 3 months of doing nothing but surviving one ill kid after another. It was my grand scheme to do a few one-on-one sessions with Jordan first to get me back up to a level where I could keep up with the class. That first workout back was rough, but I suffered through it and it felt wonderful. I was in pain for the next three days, but it was that glorious pain of knowing you did something fulfilling for yourself. And then the dominoes started falling again.
Brennan wasn't sleeping well for two nights and both twins had fevers. Kevin came home from work on Monday with an ear infection, the flu, and something else that he couldn't remember (sounds about right...) Then Evan started with the diarrhea and the twins followed suit shortly after. I was the only one still standing unscathed. I knew better. I knew it was coming, but for three days I single handedly cared for every member of our family. Changed every diaper, fed every meal, you get the picture. Kevin pretty much stayed in bed and slept. On Wednesday I started to feel it, the flu had definitely taken hold of me.
At this point Kevin had to buck up and deal with the crappy hand that had been dealt and take on the role of Mr. Mom. He did pretty good. Everyone survived, but I think the kids have now seen every episode of Yo Gabba Gabba available On Demand and on our DVR about 10 times now.
Thursday morning I felt the digestive pyrotechnic show starting to spark so I tried to quickly make my way to the bathroom. I remember thinking to myself that I was really lightheaded. And then I found myself on the floor near the shower screaming in shock and pain. I fell on my tailbone. I went to get it checked out later that night and thankfully it isn't broken, but I did jam it badly. Actually, I'm permanently disfigured now. The very tip of my tailbone has an extreme curve, almost 90 degrees. Ouch. My consolation prize? A prescription for percocet and an awesome doughnut pillow. Yeah, the ones you see old people with. I laugh at it, but it has totally been a lifesaver and I'm sure it will further prove itself to me when I'm at the office sitting in a chair for 8 hours a day. I hope the pain dwindles soon, otherwise I'm not so sure when I'll make it back to the gym.
I was so excited to make my grand re-entrance into my little world of health and fitness after 3 months of doing nothing but surviving one ill kid after another. It was my grand scheme to do a few one-on-one sessions with Jordan first to get me back up to a level where I could keep up with the class. That first workout back was rough, but I suffered through it and it felt wonderful. I was in pain for the next three days, but it was that glorious pain of knowing you did something fulfilling for yourself. And then the dominoes started falling again.
Brennan wasn't sleeping well for two nights and both twins had fevers. Kevin came home from work on Monday with an ear infection, the flu, and something else that he couldn't remember (sounds about right...) Then Evan started with the diarrhea and the twins followed suit shortly after. I was the only one still standing unscathed. I knew better. I knew it was coming, but for three days I single handedly cared for every member of our family. Changed every diaper, fed every meal, you get the picture. Kevin pretty much stayed in bed and slept. On Wednesday I started to feel it, the flu had definitely taken hold of me.
At this point Kevin had to buck up and deal with the crappy hand that had been dealt and take on the role of Mr. Mom. He did pretty good. Everyone survived, but I think the kids have now seen every episode of Yo Gabba Gabba available On Demand and on our DVR about 10 times now.
Thursday morning I felt the digestive pyrotechnic show starting to spark so I tried to quickly make my way to the bathroom. I remember thinking to myself that I was really lightheaded. And then I found myself on the floor near the shower screaming in shock and pain. I fell on my tailbone. I went to get it checked out later that night and thankfully it isn't broken, but I did jam it badly. Actually, I'm permanently disfigured now. The very tip of my tailbone has an extreme curve, almost 90 degrees. Ouch. My consolation prize? A prescription for percocet and an awesome doughnut pillow. Yeah, the ones you see old people with. I laugh at it, but it has totally been a lifesaver and I'm sure it will further prove itself to me when I'm at the office sitting in a chair for 8 hours a day. I hope the pain dwindles soon, otherwise I'm not so sure when I'll make it back to the gym.
Monday, December 20, 2010
Santa, I KNOW HIM!
Santa, this dude's everywhere! Evan missed seeing Santa back in 2008 because I was (a) pregnant [unknowingly with twins] and (b) lazy. I have continued to feel guilty about it for two years, I mean we even took Brennan and Carter their first year to see him and they were barely six months old - hellooo cold and flu season. And then it hit me, we were running out of time.
Santa is of course super busy this time of year. You know, managing the elves and whatnot. But we are super busy still in our perpetual, never-ending survival mode. I decided I didn't want to miss the pictures with the Jolly Man for the twins' second Christmas too. Off we went. To the mall. Less than a week before Christmas. With three kids.
On the way there Kevin called his parents. He was calling to make sure they were okay since his Uncle Vito (yes, that's his real name) called the night before saying he was concerned because he couldn't get a hold of them. It turns out we couldn't get them that night either, hence the call Sunday morning. He shared our plans for the morning and they decided to invite themselves along. Don't worry, it all worked out okay - they offered to pay for the pictures and for lunch. Sweet!
We got to the mall around 9:30 since the stores open up at 10. I assumed Santa would be offering his services at that time too, but I assumed incorrectly. I guess he was dealing with an elf strike or something because he jingled his buns into the mall's North Pole promptly at 11. We made do and everyone survived, but I did almost mame Carter with the stroller once. Okay, twice.
The picture turned out better than I anticipated, but like most things nowadays, I went in with nearly zero expectations. It's easier to be pleasantly surprised then, trust me. Everyone was looking at the camera, but we captured a tally of zero smiles. Nothing says "Merry Christmas" like three expressionless faces. Oh, and just for the record our Santa keeps track of every set of multiples that grace his lap. Last year he had 160 sets of twins, 9 sets of triplets, and 1 set of quads. I wonder if he can feel his legs at the end of the day or season?
Santa is of course super busy this time of year. You know, managing the elves and whatnot. But we are super busy still in our perpetual, never-ending survival mode. I decided I didn't want to miss the pictures with the Jolly Man for the twins' second Christmas too. Off we went. To the mall. Less than a week before Christmas. With three kids.
On the way there Kevin called his parents. He was calling to make sure they were okay since his Uncle Vito (yes, that's his real name) called the night before saying he was concerned because he couldn't get a hold of them. It turns out we couldn't get them that night either, hence the call Sunday morning. He shared our plans for the morning and they decided to invite themselves along. Don't worry, it all worked out okay - they offered to pay for the pictures and for lunch. Sweet!
We got to the mall around 9:30 since the stores open up at 10. I assumed Santa would be offering his services at that time too, but I assumed incorrectly. I guess he was dealing with an elf strike or something because he jingled his buns into the mall's North Pole promptly at 11. We made do and everyone survived, but I did almost mame Carter with the stroller once. Okay, twice.
The picture turned out better than I anticipated, but like most things nowadays, I went in with nearly zero expectations. It's easier to be pleasantly surprised then, trust me. Everyone was looking at the camera, but we captured a tally of zero smiles. Nothing says "Merry Christmas" like three expressionless faces. Oh, and just for the record our Santa keeps track of every set of multiples that grace his lap. Last year he had 160 sets of twins, 9 sets of triplets, and 1 set of quads. I wonder if he can feel his legs at the end of the day or season?
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
So That's What Space Looks Like
I think I very well may have dropped off from the face of the earth. Somehow I survived without my space suit, although with recent events I also wish I would've had a Hazmat suit!
What's (not) new you ask? Sick kids, you know, the usual. The first year of daycare stuff really sucks when there are two of them. Yes, I'm complaining about this AGAIN. Stomach bug and random fevers and colds for the kiddos, same stomach bug, sinus infections, dizziness and other fun stuff for mom. That's what my life has been for the past 2 months. Literally, there was an occasional day of work thrown in there, but by no means was this the norm.
I've been battling vertigo and had a CT scan done at the recommendation of my ENT. The scan didn't show any further signs of sinus infection, but the Dr. did notice some enlarged adenoid tissue. I was scoped in the office and heard "well that's *interesting*" from the doctor. Never awesome news, right? He's not sure if it's adenoid tissue or not, since it was showing in a weird manner, but either way "it has to come out". I'm having surgery on the fifteenth and am kind of freaking out more so about being put completely under. This will be my first surgery other than my c-section with the boys, which I was awake for.
I haven't been to the gym since sometime around October 5th, with sick kids and all it's just hard to squeeze in that hour of the day when Kevin is crying at the mere thought of dealing with all three of them in that state. Feeling kind of crappy, but it's probably also pretty dangerous to lift heavy weights over your head when your head feels like it's drunk.
My ENT also had his audiologist do a test to see where the dizziness is coming from, whether it be neurological, etc. The good news is: I am not crazy. The dizziness is real and I have scientific proof. The bad news, there's still not much they can do about it. I'm still waiting for a call back from the doctor to hear what he says about it after he reads my report.
The boys (sickness aside) have been doing well. Evan is growing into being quite an awesome older brother. It was a struggle there for a long time, but now he's great at sharing and apologizing when he does something bad to them. He even likes playing with them! It makes me all squishy inside. It's moments like these that make me happy to have three boys. I don't really know how a sister would fit into that equation, probably with lots of tears and blood.
What's (not) new you ask? Sick kids, you know, the usual. The first year of daycare stuff really sucks when there are two of them. Yes, I'm complaining about this AGAIN. Stomach bug and random fevers and colds for the kiddos, same stomach bug, sinus infections, dizziness and other fun stuff for mom. That's what my life has been for the past 2 months. Literally, there was an occasional day of work thrown in there, but by no means was this the norm.
I've been battling vertigo and had a CT scan done at the recommendation of my ENT. The scan didn't show any further signs of sinus infection, but the Dr. did notice some enlarged adenoid tissue. I was scoped in the office and heard "well that's *interesting*" from the doctor. Never awesome news, right? He's not sure if it's adenoid tissue or not, since it was showing in a weird manner, but either way "it has to come out". I'm having surgery on the fifteenth and am kind of freaking out more so about being put completely under. This will be my first surgery other than my c-section with the boys, which I was awake for.
I haven't been to the gym since sometime around October 5th, with sick kids and all it's just hard to squeeze in that hour of the day when Kevin is crying at the mere thought of dealing with all three of them in that state. Feeling kind of crappy, but it's probably also pretty dangerous to lift heavy weights over your head when your head feels like it's drunk.
My ENT also had his audiologist do a test to see where the dizziness is coming from, whether it be neurological, etc. The good news is: I am not crazy. The dizziness is real and I have scientific proof. The bad news, there's still not much they can do about it. I'm still waiting for a call back from the doctor to hear what he says about it after he reads my report.
The boys (sickness aside) have been doing well. Evan is growing into being quite an awesome older brother. It was a struggle there for a long time, but now he's great at sharing and apologizing when he does something bad to them. He even likes playing with them! It makes me all squishy inside. It's moments like these that make me happy to have three boys. I don't really know how a sister would fit into that equation, probably with lots of tears and blood.
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
We're a Family
We're a family - we share, that's just what we do. This week Brennan and Carter were nice enough to yet again share their sickness with me. But seriously, who could resist kisses from two of the world's cutest one year olds?
The month of October has not been kind to our family and I'm ready to move on to November. And for that matter, I'm ready for the impending holidays so that we are that much closer to Spring and welcoming warm weather. Although, it has been unseasonly warm in St. Louis this year. It's a lovely 70 degrees outside right now - but Mother Nature can't fool me, she'll blow her cold fronts in here at the drop of a hat and never look back. That's the way it is around here, this area is kind of known for it's wacky weather...tomorrow's supposed to be in the 50s. I can almost feel the cold wind and snow.
Despite that previous paragraph, I really am looking forward to Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. This Sunday, Evan will be dressed up as Thomas the Tank Engine, Brennan is the monkey that Evan was nearly two years ago, and Carter is the cutest little Elephant I've seen around these parts. The original plan was to have them all dressed up as circus/zoo animals since that's how we feel nowadays. I swear there's a clown creeping in my shadows playing circus music 24/7. Evan was going to be a giraffe, but out of the corner of his eyes he spied that dreadful Thomas costume.
I don't have a beef with Thomas, but this particular costume is so cheap looking. But...I'd rather have a happy Thomas than a grumpy giraffe. And consequently pictures with (hopefully) three happy kiddos. Happy Trick or Treating!
The month of October has not been kind to our family and I'm ready to move on to November. And for that matter, I'm ready for the impending holidays so that we are that much closer to Spring and welcoming warm weather. Although, it has been unseasonly warm in St. Louis this year. It's a lovely 70 degrees outside right now - but Mother Nature can't fool me, she'll blow her cold fronts in here at the drop of a hat and never look back. That's the way it is around here, this area is kind of known for it's wacky weather...tomorrow's supposed to be in the 50s. I can almost feel the cold wind and snow.
Despite that previous paragraph, I really am looking forward to Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. This Sunday, Evan will be dressed up as Thomas the Tank Engine, Brennan is the monkey that Evan was nearly two years ago, and Carter is the cutest little Elephant I've seen around these parts. The original plan was to have them all dressed up as circus/zoo animals since that's how we feel nowadays. I swear there's a clown creeping in my shadows playing circus music 24/7. Evan was going to be a giraffe, but out of the corner of his eyes he spied that dreadful Thomas costume.
I don't have a beef with Thomas, but this particular costume is so cheap looking. But...I'd rather have a happy Thomas than a grumpy giraffe. And consequently pictures with (hopefully) three happy kiddos. Happy Trick or Treating!
Monday, October 4, 2010
A Shopping Gripe
Those of you who are friends with me on Facebook have already heard my gripe for the day, so sorry if you hear it again here.
I hate those days that I desperately need to get to the store on my "day off" also known as my day home with the kids, also known as my not-so-day-off. I need to make a few stops today and I'm trying to decide if I'm feeling brave enough; one to Sam's or Costco, another to the regular grocery store, and another to our local Target. I really would love to get this done during the day while Kevin's at work, but as those of you with two or more small children know, easier said than done.
I've got a three year old that has two options: (1) walk or (2) sit in the big, basket portion of the shopping cart and be surrounded and squished by shampoo and tampons. Inevitably, if he's actually chosen to sit in the basket, he gets maniacal and has the increased urge to stand up in the cart while it's moving, risking a nice goose egg for him and onslaughts of starring from strangers for mommy.
If he chooses to walk it's pretty much guaranteed that he'll make a mad dash to the toy aisles leaving mommy behind in between the toilet paper and Lysol sprays with two screaming babies. I've yet to totally lose him in a store, but I honestly feel like that luck is rapidly approaching an unsafe danger zone. I'm just waiting for the day to hear a page over the intercom system stating that somewhere in the store a failure for a mother is missing her firstborn son.
This is all assuming I've been fortunate enough to score a cart that miraculously seats both of my one year olds in the first place. The Target we frequent hasn't jumped on my list of "stores I adore because they cater to moms with more than one small child" - no double carts (that aren't broken, anyway). So B & C usually end up with one leg bent and smashing their little manly bits into their intestines while the other leg dangles freely through one of the leg hole openings. At least half of their bodies are comfortable. :insert sarcastic eyeroll here:
As you can imagine, this arrangement interferes with the personal bubbles of even the smallest of mankind. A few minutes into our trip to hell elapse and I have reached my threshold for screaming and whining. Then the true madness starts - the biting. Oh, the biting! They both lean into the other and chomp down on anything they can get a hold of; a shoulder, some fingers, even a cheek or nose - no discriminating for the Wibb boys, they take whatever they can get, so long as it ends in tears. (The suffering of blood relatives apparently makes them their happiest.)
Usually by this time I am doing my best at giving evil glances back to the slew of onlookers we've developed as we try to race about the store in a last-ditch effort to grab everything on the list before someone reports me to CPS. There are always those few "helpful" people that like to joke and make comments like, "Wow! You've really got your hands full, don't you?" and delay your trip to the checkout counter by a couple of seconds more.
And most likely, an astounding 99% of the time we end up forgetting the number one reason we went into the store in the first place, whether it be diapers, milk, or maybe even Advil for the kid-induced headaches that are a daily occurrence. I know, you're jealous!
I hate those days that I desperately need to get to the store on my "day off" also known as my day home with the kids, also known as my not-so-day-off. I need to make a few stops today and I'm trying to decide if I'm feeling brave enough; one to Sam's or Costco, another to the regular grocery store, and another to our local Target. I really would love to get this done during the day while Kevin's at work, but as those of you with two or more small children know, easier said than done.
I've got a three year old that has two options: (1) walk or (2) sit in the big, basket portion of the shopping cart and be surrounded and squished by shampoo and tampons. Inevitably, if he's actually chosen to sit in the basket, he gets maniacal and has the increased urge to stand up in the cart while it's moving, risking a nice goose egg for him and onslaughts of starring from strangers for mommy.
If he chooses to walk it's pretty much guaranteed that he'll make a mad dash to the toy aisles leaving mommy behind in between the toilet paper and Lysol sprays with two screaming babies. I've yet to totally lose him in a store, but I honestly feel like that luck is rapidly approaching an unsafe danger zone. I'm just waiting for the day to hear a page over the intercom system stating that somewhere in the store a failure for a mother is missing her firstborn son.
This is all assuming I've been fortunate enough to score a cart that miraculously seats both of my one year olds in the first place. The Target we frequent hasn't jumped on my list of "stores I adore because they cater to moms with more than one small child" - no double carts (that aren't broken, anyway). So B & C usually end up with one leg bent and smashing their little manly bits into their intestines while the other leg dangles freely through one of the leg hole openings. At least half of their bodies are comfortable. :insert sarcastic eyeroll here:
As you can imagine, this arrangement interferes with the personal bubbles of even the smallest of mankind. A few minutes into our trip to hell elapse and I have reached my threshold for screaming and whining. Then the true madness starts - the biting. Oh, the biting! They both lean into the other and chomp down on anything they can get a hold of; a shoulder, some fingers, even a cheek or nose - no discriminating for the Wibb boys, they take whatever they can get, so long as it ends in tears. (The suffering of blood relatives apparently makes them their happiest.)
Usually by this time I am doing my best at giving evil glances back to the slew of onlookers we've developed as we try to race about the store in a last-ditch effort to grab everything on the list before someone reports me to CPS. There are always those few "helpful" people that like to joke and make comments like, "Wow! You've really got your hands full, don't you?" and delay your trip to the checkout counter by a couple of seconds more.
And most likely, an astounding 99% of the time we end up forgetting the number one reason we went into the store in the first place, whether it be diapers, milk, or maybe even Advil for the kid-induced headaches that are a daily occurrence. I know, you're jealous!
Thursday, September 23, 2010
I'm still alive :)
It's been a while since I've even checked in here. Sorry :( The babies haven't been sick in quite a few weeks, so that's good. Evan's finally starting to come around to them and treat them nicely (most of the time). Evan's getting bigger and smarter by the day, I swear this kid amazes me all the time.
Our Parents As Teachers rep came over last week for a visit with the twins and Evan was doing a puzzle in the floor. Ms. Jenny noticed how quick and efficient he was at putting it together and made the comment that what he was doing was at a first grade level.
I also tried something new with him three nights ago and he did surprisingly well at it. We brought up his art easel from the basement and I spelled out words on the dirty chalkboard with my fingers to see if he could trace over them - and he did awesome at it! I think I'm going to purchase one of the preschool learning books for him that have the letters to trace so they can learn how to write. He's also doing basic addition and subtraction. Seriously, so stinkin' smart.
The babies are doing great and are growing so much; they're such big boys! They both have a nice handful of words and really like playing with their shape sorters. Their appetites are out of control and they are still out-eating Evan most of the time. They don't really have many foods they don't enjoy.
Things are going great with working out still and I'm down to 132 as of this morning. I went for a tummy tuck consultation on Wednesday to see how much money I need to save up. Ugh, seems like getting voluntarily sliced across your stomach has a going rate of about $9k around here. The doctor said I was an awesome candidate since I've lost a ton of weight and that in her opinion I was at my ideal body weight. She was also really impressed with my abs and said she has never seen a person that's had multiples keep their abs as intact as I have, almost zero separation. And to think my stomach was measuring nearly 60 weeks pregnant at the end. I was spared in one area, at least.
It's always great hearing how you can be an inspiration to others in real life. Today a coworker told me that she really looked up to me for making the healthy lifestyle changes and that she is starting to get back into health and fitness too. It never gets old when you see people changing their lives because of the improvements they see you doing in your own. And then there are the coworkers who are afraid to tell me what they had for their last meal because they think I'm secretly judging them :P (I'm not) If there's one thing that I believe whole-heartedly, it's that you really have to want the change you desire down to your core, with every ounce of your being. If there's even the faintest of doubts, you are almost certainly setting yourself up for some form of failure.
I struggle with my food choices every day, and I still slip into some slight binge cycles and mindless eating, but after I do (and I inevitably feel like crap emotionally and physically) I try to ask myself what caused it and what I learned from it.
Last night was a candy corn binge. I told myself I could have one. And then another. And then another, and before I knew it, I had the entire container sitting in my lap going for handful after handful. And then I felt sick to my stomach. What did I learn? That I really can't have "just one" - it's nearly impossible.
Our Parents As Teachers rep came over last week for a visit with the twins and Evan was doing a puzzle in the floor. Ms. Jenny noticed how quick and efficient he was at putting it together and made the comment that what he was doing was at a first grade level.
I also tried something new with him three nights ago and he did surprisingly well at it. We brought up his art easel from the basement and I spelled out words on the dirty chalkboard with my fingers to see if he could trace over them - and he did awesome at it! I think I'm going to purchase one of the preschool learning books for him that have the letters to trace so they can learn how to write. He's also doing basic addition and subtraction. Seriously, so stinkin' smart.
The babies are doing great and are growing so much; they're such big boys! They both have a nice handful of words and really like playing with their shape sorters. Their appetites are out of control and they are still out-eating Evan most of the time. They don't really have many foods they don't enjoy.
Things are going great with working out still and I'm down to 132 as of this morning. I went for a tummy tuck consultation on Wednesday to see how much money I need to save up. Ugh, seems like getting voluntarily sliced across your stomach has a going rate of about $9k around here. The doctor said I was an awesome candidate since I've lost a ton of weight and that in her opinion I was at my ideal body weight. She was also really impressed with my abs and said she has never seen a person that's had multiples keep their abs as intact as I have, almost zero separation. And to think my stomach was measuring nearly 60 weeks pregnant at the end. I was spared in one area, at least.
It's always great hearing how you can be an inspiration to others in real life. Today a coworker told me that she really looked up to me for making the healthy lifestyle changes and that she is starting to get back into health and fitness too. It never gets old when you see people changing their lives because of the improvements they see you doing in your own. And then there are the coworkers who are afraid to tell me what they had for their last meal because they think I'm secretly judging them :P (I'm not) If there's one thing that I believe whole-heartedly, it's that you really have to want the change you desire down to your core, with every ounce of your being. If there's even the faintest of doubts, you are almost certainly setting yourself up for some form of failure.
I struggle with my food choices every day, and I still slip into some slight binge cycles and mindless eating, but after I do (and I inevitably feel like crap emotionally and physically) I try to ask myself what caused it and what I learned from it.
Last night was a candy corn binge. I told myself I could have one. And then another. And then another, and before I knew it, I had the entire container sitting in my lap going for handful after handful. And then I felt sick to my stomach. What did I learn? That I really can't have "just one" - it's nearly impossible.
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