Every Word Is The Truth

I have recently made this blog private, and for several reasons. In a moment of non-clarity I posted the link in a little box under my profile picture on Facebook, thinking not a lot of people would really see it. Over the last week or two I've noticed more traffic on this blog and quite honestly it freaked me out. The first thing I did was take my link on Facebook down - there are way too many people I am "friends" with that I'd prefer not read the details of my girly goods, etc. Why is it always easier to share with people you don't really know? Also, I found that family was passing word along of how I was "doing" or "feeling" based on what I post here. I tell the truth in every single post, but I don't add in every detail or give updates every minute, hour, or even day. That's not why I started this blog. Who knows, perhaps sometime in the future I will make it public again.

I am keeping track of details for myself. I am ashamed to admit that I have no written records from when I was pregnant with Evan or even his first year and a half of growing up in this world. Even though those memories are somewhat fresh, I realize that I will lose those special details in my head over time. I don't even have his baby book started since every picture from birth to three months is on a computer that isn't working at the moment. You can't really start it beginning with month four, right?

Anyway, since I've now stated the purpose of this blog, I'd like to add a few details that I haven't written or posted about on here yet, some of you will find that you already know these details, but I don't want to forget these things.


A week to the day before we found out about the two little miracles in my belly, I had posted on a forum for moms. The topic of that post read, "Be honest, does it look like there should be two of them in there?" and then contained a picture of my belly at 18 weeks. It is quite safe to say I felt like a cow (and now we know why). Of course everyone who replied was nice and assured me that I looked great. I have come to the conclusion that these girls are a bunch of very supportive liars! They did it for my own good and sanity, no one wants to here that they really are huge. It's quite funny in retrospect.

It might have been that same afternoon, I don't remember the exact day...but sometime around the event mentioned above I was cooking dinner and cracked open an egg. I looked down, and to my surprise that egg contained TWO yolks! They even had the appearance of being fertilized, even though that would be highly unlikely considering the living arrangements of hens that are being utilized for egg production, but I digress.

Also, a few weeks before our surprise I made a same day appointment with my OB for pains I was having in my pelvis. I suspected it was round ligament pain, but couldn't remember having it that early with Evan, so I went in to get checked out. While I was there, Dr. K was having a hard time keeping the heartbeat on the doppler long enough to calculate the beats per minute. She would lock in on it, only to find that in about two seconds it seemed like the baby was moving and rolling around and she would quickly lose track of it. She went from one side of my stomach to the other repeating this chain of events about five or six times. It was actually quite comical and we were both giggling wondering what my little baby was up to. Hind sight really is 20/20, isn't it?

Something else I don't want to forget...it was the Sunday after we found out about our twins and I was attending the bridal shower of a younger cousin. My mom felt it would be good to wait and tell our relatives the news in person, so I obliged. There were only a few of us there at the time since we were getting the room set up. My Aunt Janet (John's Janet - there are two Janets on that side of the family) had asked me when I was due. For those of you that don't know this particular Janet, or my weido family for that matter, some of us have really strange things, feelings, visions, dreams, what have you, including myself and also my father. Bizarre circumstances always seem to unfold, call it what you want. When I explained my new circumstances and shared my story with her, you could see that look come across her face.

She had just had a flashback to when I was probably somewhere around a year old and crawling around on the floor playing. She was pregnant at the time and was talking with my Grandpa about how she was scared she was carrying twins. (Remember they didn't have the technology we do nowadays, so she really had no clue.) According to her, my Grandpa reassured her that she only had one baby in there...and then pointed to me crawling and playing on the floor and said, "Nope, Diddles is the one that will have twins!" For the record, I'm Diddles...that was and still is my nickname in our family. It was deemed apon me when I was a teeny little baby (again) crawling around on the floor and babbling "diddle diddle diddle" everywhere I went.

My Grandpa passed away in August of 1996 and I still think about him all the time. When my Aunt told me that story it comforted me greatly (and also gave me chills/freaked me out). In some weird way it makes me feel like he chose me to carry on this family trait - his father was an identical twin, as are two of his sons, one of them happening to be my father. It's just something that makes me feel closer to him even though I know he isn't alive anymore. Just reliving that story in my mind makes me smile.